Overcoming fear after a crash?

Message
Author
User avatar
clutch
Rookie
Rookie
Posts: 8
Joined: Sat Oct 04, 2008 10:38 am
Sex: Female
Years Riding: 5
My Motorcycle: 2004 Harley Street Glide
Location: US Mid-Atlantic Coast

Overcoming fear after a crash?

#1 Unread post by clutch »

Hi, Ladies

I'm new here. I'm so glad to find this place!

My fiance has been riding for about 20 years. I've been riding as a passenger for 2 years.

He surprised me and got a Honda Rebel 250. I completed the MSF beginners course in June so I could start riding.

On my first trek outside of the neighborhood, I crashed. I was trying to keep up with him while going around a curve, but I ran off the road.

Three months later, my leg has finally healed up enough to try riding again. So I tried to ride today. I just stayed on our neighborhood street.

Although I thought I was ready physically & emotionally, the fear took over. The only thing I could think was "I'm going to crash! I'm going to crash! I'm going to crash!" I never made it off of our street. And I almost crashed twice!

I want to ride, but I'm afraid to get back on the bike.

How do you conquer your fear after a crash?

User avatar
Thumper
Legendary 500
Legendary 500
Posts: 577
Joined: Wed May 10, 2006 5:40 pm
Real Name: K.A. Thompson
Sex: Female
Years Riding: 9
My Motorcycle: '14 BMW F700GS
Location: Dixon, CA

#2 Unread post by Thumper »

Back in February, I locked up the front brake on my SV (giant blue car pulled out on front of me...no swerving room, but I still should not have locked the brakes up like that) and was launched off the bike. Hitting the ground was not a happy experience (and the moron in the car watched long enough to see me hit, then he left. Such class...) I didn't think I was hurt, but dang I was glad they gave me Percoset in the ER. The next few days were not made up out of happy fun time. Well, other than the Percoset buzz. I did enjoy that.

Once I wasn't so sore, I took my Rebel out for a spin. Didn't think a thing about it until I was actually headed out into traffic...and then it was OHMAYGAWD SOMEONE IS GONNA HIT ME!!!

Where I was comfortable before, suddenly it was NOOOOOOOOOO!

So I kinda get where you're coming from.

What I did, while I waited for my SV to be repaired, was to take the Rebel to a nearby parking lot, and practice. I pretended like I was starting from scratch, relearning the controls, practicing braking, weaving...all the things you do in the BRC.

Then I made my way slowly around the neighborhood...I didn't push it as far as getting out into traffic. I think if I had, I might have stopped riding altogether. The fear is very real and it's normal to have it...just get back on slowly, at your own speed, and don't let anyone push you into tackling traffic or speeds higher than 25 until you're ready to.

By the time I got my SV back, I was good to go...the height of the bike presented some post-accident problems, but that's a whole other story. What matters is that by taking it at my own speed, not pushing myself to get onto "real" roads too quickly, I was able to get back to riding.

blues2cruise
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 10182
Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2005 4:28 pm
Sex: Female
Years Riding: 16
My Motorcycle: 2000 Yamaha V-Star 1100
Location: Vancouver, British Columbia

#3 Unread post by blues2cruise »

Hi clutch....

First of all......:welcome5: to TMW. :)

Don't beat yourself up about being afraid or nervous...it's normal....

After my crash I could not ride for several months.....when I finally did decide to try I stayed close to home and only went for a few blocks and came back. I just wanted to see if I could do it.....

I got a friend to come along when I decided to go a bit further to a parking lot for practice.....I was tense, I clenched my jaw, my shoulders were hunched up around my ears and I had a death grip on the handlebars....just like when I first learned....

I had problems in the parking lot for the first few times doing uturns and going in circles.....I was afraid to lean the bike and I was making my circles and turns very large....

I was also quite jumpy....everytime I saw a car in a driveway or a side street waiting to come out, I tensed up....
for the first little while I wasn't sure I even wanted to ride anymore.

It wasn't fun. I felt like the joy had been taken away.....however.....not being one to "quit"....I kept at it.....

I am getting so much better now...I still have some trepidation now and then....I sometimes just ride in the slow lane with the slow traffic until the passing lane is empty for as far as the eye can see....I feel a sense of uncertainty about passing as yet.....but...it is getting so much better.

If you got back on your bike that is good. Just go a few blocks and then go home.....build up slowly. Get to a parking lot to practice....go for short rides and then go home......

It will get better. :)
Image

User avatar
goodies
Veteran
Veteran
Posts: 92
Joined: Thu Aug 07, 2008 4:29 am

#4 Unread post by goodies »

The fear is very real. I had a "almost" accident my second day of owning mine, (way to much way to soon), that was in July. Since than I have completed the MSF, and practiced in parking lots and neighborhood, and have not been out in traffic. Today I am planning on a "real" road ride, nothing far, it is Sunday AM so not as much traffic. I go at it little by little. But I know I will get there.

One thing that has really helped with the riding in traffic has been riding 2 up with a friend of mine. That may sound off, but it helps me getting the feeling of traffic coming at me.

User avatar
clutch
Rookie
Rookie
Posts: 8
Joined: Sat Oct 04, 2008 10:38 am
Sex: Female
Years Riding: 5
My Motorcycle: 2004 Harley Street Glide
Location: US Mid-Atlantic Coast

#5 Unread post by clutch »

Thank you all so much! It really helps to know that I'm not crazy or inferior for being scared. When I asked some guys about the fear, they treated me like I was stupid. So I'm really glad this ladies forum is here.

I will try your parking lot suggestion today. (Although I have this ridiculous temptation to get some hockey goalie gear and practice in that, lol!) I still remember the exercises from the MSF class -- so thank you for reminding me.

I've been riding 2-up for a few months after the accident. I just have to keep in mind that his touring-sized Street Glide will feel different from my tiny Rebel 250. That difference freaks me out sometimes and makes me wonder if I'm doing something wrong, or there's something wrong with my bike. I guess experience will help with that?

And good luck on your real road ride, Goodies. Let us know how it goes :)

Thanks again, ladies!

User avatar
goodies
Veteran
Veteran
Posts: 92
Joined: Thu Aug 07, 2008 4:29 am

#6 Unread post by goodies »

Guys are always so relaxed about it. "Just do it" It must be nice to be like that! I envy them that.

The ride went great, not far we road to a little restaurant and had breakfast. But there was so many good experience variable. In town, down a 4 lane, (not interstate, which was really easier than I thought it would be), side roads, stop lights.

I was pretty relaxed, than all of a sudden I started getting nervous, and not riding as well as I did when I first headed out. So I knew than it was time to call it a morning. But that is ok! This time last weekend I would not even attempt it.

User avatar
Lion_Lady
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 1884
Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2004 6:44 am
Real Name: Pam
Sex: Female
Years Riding: 20
My Motorcycle: 2013 BMW R1200R 90th Anniversary
Location: Lynchburg, VA

#7 Unread post by Lion_Lady »

Were you wearing gear when you crashed? How do you think that effects how badly you were injured?

It certainly sounds like your determination is there, you've just got to take baby steps to regain your confidence. Remember to keep your practices short (the stress/adrenaline will wear you out much more quickly than you can imagine) and end on a positive note.

Good luck and keep us posted!

P
Courage in women is often mistaken for insanity - Alice Paul

User avatar
clutch
Rookie
Rookie
Posts: 8
Joined: Sat Oct 04, 2008 10:38 am
Sex: Female
Years Riding: 5
My Motorcycle: 2004 Harley Street Glide
Location: US Mid-Atlantic Coast

#8 Unread post by clutch »

Lion_Lady wrote:Were you wearing gear when you crashed? How do you think that effects how badly you were injured?

It certainly sounds like your determination is there, you've just got to take baby steps to regain your confidence. Remember to keep your practices short (the stress/adrenaline will wear you out much more quickly than you can imagine) and end on a positive note.

Good luck and keep us posted!

P
Yes, I should have been wearing more gear.

I was wearing a full face helmet, long jeans, and motorcycle boots. I WISH that I had also been wearing gloves and an armored jacket. Armored pants could have helped, but I've never been able to find any that fit.

The parking lot ride went well today. I practiced the MSF exercises. The confidence is coming back a bit, but I'm going to stay off the streets for a long while!

Thanks again for all of your suggestions and support!

mazer
Elite
Elite
Posts: 171
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2008 2:49 pm

#9 Unread post by mazer »

Just keep around your house for a bit just like you did before you ventured away and started freaking out. Test your comfort zones a bit at a time. Always end on a positive note. You mentioned in your OP that you
ALMOST crashed
twice, but you didnt. Just keep trucking on...I have been reading about people who were in accidents so bad they lost consciousness or were temporarily paralyzed but love motorcycling so much they made their way back to riding, some having to make alterations because of permanent damage. Breathe through those panic attacks and remind yourself that was then and this is now...good luck I know it is hard getting back on the horse.

User avatar
amysue529
Rookie
Rookie
Posts: 14
Joined: Sat Apr 04, 2009 3:46 am
Real Name: Amy
Sex: Female
Years Riding: 2
My Motorcycle: 2009 Kawasaki Ninja 250R
Location: South/Central Michigan

Re: Overcoming fear after a crash?

#10 Unread post by amysue529 »

Last year was my first official year with a bike. I really wanted to start out on a 250, since id never ridden before, even dirtbikes or anything similar. I dont know what made me do this, but I went out and bought a brand new 250 Ninja. Within 3 days we (my boyfriend and I) were riding everywhere... I was getting SO confident. A little too confident. We went down his favorite curvy road.. a few curves in, he hit some gravel, went off the road a bit, but didn't crash or anything. A few curves later, Im staring at the pavement (not looking through the curve like I was supposed to be) trying to avoid any gravel, and I crashed into a pretty deep ditch. My brand new bike was pretty messed up. I hit my head pretty hard ( even wearing a full faced helmet) but fortunately just got bruises and scrapes. I had no choice but to ride it home... but you bet I went like 35mph... lol.

A few weeks went by and my bike got fixed.... I was terrified to go riding. :cry: I went around the block for a few days. I was so scared of curves that I froze up trying to go around them. I wouldn't lean and slowed way down, and eventually went around them very very stiffly.

I too am SO sick of the way men deal with this stuff. "Get over it" or "Just loosen up".. I guess it doesn't help that I am the only girl in a pack of speed-loving sportbike riders. :frusty: Eventually, it will get better. But dont let anyone tell you how to deal with it. We each deal with things differently. My crash was in April, and by August I was 100% more confident than I was after my accident. Don't let the fear of crashing keep you grounded though.... We all ride for a reason, and one accident shouldn't be good enough to take that joy away from you. Take baby steps and only do what you are comfortable with. I found that after the guys finally shut up and I could hear myself think I was able to be more comfortable... getting everyone else's input on how you should deal with stuff only creates more stress and anxiety about it.

It will get easier each time you ride, as long as you take it at your own pace. I felt like it was almost easier to ride by myself, on familiar country roads... I gained a lot of confidence that way. Good luck!
We're here for a good time, not for a long time

Post Reply