You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .

[MASHBY]

. . . that "disturbance in the Force" was just last night's baked beans.

. . . you call your young apprentice, "Juner.(JR.)"

. . . your landspeeder has a gun rack.

. . . you call Yoda your Li'l green buddy.

. . . your X-Wing has a still in it.

. . . your lightsaber has a beer can crusher in the base.

. . . you have ever used a lightsaber to light the barbecue grill.

. . . you use Jawas for drink holders.

. . . you fight with a lightsaber in one hand and a spit cup in the other.

. . . you use a Jedi mind trick to stop the beer truck.

. . . your Jedi robe is camouflage colored.

. . . at least one wing of your X-Wing is primer colored.

. . . you can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.

. . . you have ever used the Force in conjunction with fishing / bowling.

. . . your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son, come on over t' the dark side...it'll be a hoot."

. . . you jump-start your lightsaber off a car battery.

. . . you got your lightsaber by sending in 750 Skoal Lids.

. . . you count B.O. as a Jedi power.

. . . you have ever used a lightsaber to skin a deer.

. . . you have bantha horns on the front of your landspeeder.

. . . you can levitate yourself using a force from within, but not THE FORCE.

. . . your master ever said "My finger you will pull..hmmm?"

. . . you have ever had an X-wing up on blocks in your yard.

. . . the worst part of spending time on Dagoba is the dadgum skeeters.

. . . wookies are offended by your B.O.

. . . you have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.

. . . you have ever used a light-sabre to clean fish or open a non-twist-off bottle of beer.

. . . you've got a stuffed womp rat from Begger's Canyon on your mantle.

. . . you've used a storm trooper helmet as a spitoon.

. . . you have ever used baling wire and/or duct tape to make repairs on your landspeeder.

. . . you feel that duct tape is like the force: it has a light side and a dark side and it holds the universe together.

. . . you ever heard the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."

. . . you have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your land-speeder.

. . . you ever fantasized about Princess Leah wearing Daisy Duke shorts.

. . . you have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.

. . . you suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with a redwood deck.

. . . you use your lightsabor as a bug zapper.

. . . you hear . . . "Luke, I am your father . . . and your uncle!"

[Sev]

Sounds like a Newfie Jedi to me...