Community... Is it really???

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Rebeccaatthewell
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Community... Is it really???

#1 Unread post by Rebeccaatthewell »

I found out that there are about 30 to 40 bikers that meet once a week to eat at this restaurant and look at each other's bikes, so I decided to go and see if I could join in with community because I don't have any friends that ride and in truth I don't know anyone that rides enough to go riding with them. But when I got there not one person, driver or passenger smiled at me or even said hey. I admit I wasn't dressed in black leather jackets or vests and didn't have on a Harley t'shirt or black boots, but I was very surprised that no one even tried to welcome me or make me feel like I was welcome. It is not an exclusive group and they don't consider themselves a club of any kind (This is what the person who goes every week and told me about them said). I was just saddened and surprised that this mythical concept of community doesn't seem to really exist . I also noticed 1 amazing chopper, a lot of Harley's and Honda s. In fact I did not see one bike besides mine that was a Suzuki. You guys who are members of groups, what do you do when an obviously new person shows up. Do you just ignore them or invite them inside? Maybe I am asking to much, I always thought motorcycle riders were (for the most part) a community that at least recognized each other, but now I really feel alone.
I guess I was just fooling myself that I belonged because I rode. What do you guys think?
Becca
The only time when evil can triamph, is when good men do nothing!

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honda599
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#2 Unread post by honda599 »

Hi Becca

Too bad you had such a negative experience with that group. I personally don't ride with a group or belong to any clubs. I enjoy taking some time to ride at my level and escape from it all. I have friends that ride and sometimes I call them up and go for a ride.

One event I like to ride is our local toy run, which accepts all bikers. We participate in a organized ride to raise toys and money for under privileged kids near Xmas.

I would like to think that a good group should accept and welcome you with open arms, besides I think women that ride are extra cool.

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Gummiente
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#3 Unread post by Gummiente »

I've always made it a point to welcome new riders in any of the groups I've belonged to. Sounds like the ones you met - or tried to meet - weren't very sociable. Just out of curiosity, though, did any of them see you pull up on your bike? Perhaps they didn't notice your arrival and thought you were only a wannabe?

Anyway, I've experienced many times what you did today. Maybe give them one more chance or just find someone else to ride with - there's a lot of great people out there who don't care what you ride.
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#4 Unread post by scan »

I can only say I would be friendly. I see a mixed reaction depending where I go. There is a bike night near here every Wednesday. I go almost every week. I've gotten to know a few guys there and we talk every week now. It happened over time though, not the first day I showed up. I have spoken to others each week as well, and people are mostly friendly. Most weeks around 100 bikes show up, and mixed in there are clubs and cliques who would not socialize out of their group, and just come to be a part of the bike night - I guess. When I see riders out in the world at a stop, and we are both on bikes, I usually strike up a short conversation - usually about their bike. Most people love to talk about their bike.
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"What good fortune for those of us in power that people do not think. " Hitler - think about that one for a minute.

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#5 Unread post by iwannadie »

scanevalexec wrote:When I see riders out in the world at a stop, and we are both on bikes, I usually strike up a short conversation - usually about their bike. Most people love to talk about their bike.
i kind of get sick of random people wanting to talk bikes with me when they see i have one. sure i like talking bikes but most of the time is some guy going on how he loves 'xxxx brand/model' and how thats the only bike hed ever ride, then a few minutes later you find out hes never rode or owned a bike but hes the proclaimed expert suddenly. i wish people would just ignore me most of the time ha.

same thing with guns, people see mine and ask 'hey is that a glock?'. my gun looks no thing like a glock, people are just familiar with that particular gun and then try to come off as an expert about guns. i was stuck in line with some guy going on about how glocks are the only gun worth owning. wouldnt accept any argument other wise i finally ask 'so what kind of glock do you have then?'. he never fired a gun before.
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scan
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#6 Unread post by scan »

iwannadie wrote:
scanevalexec wrote:When I see riders out in the world at a stop, and we are both on bikes, I usually strike up a short conversation - usually about their bike. Most people love to talk about their bike.
i kind of get sick of random people wanting to talk bikes with me when they see i have one. i wish people would just ignore me most of the time ha.
So I take it that your advice is to not talk to anyone else? Do you think most people are annoyed when I ride up on a bike and ask about theirs? I'd still think it would be better to spread a sense of community.

And to address your issue with non-riders - I would still rather leave people with the impression that motorcyclist are a mostly friendly bunch. We have enough people affraid/misundestanding us are driving cages. Plus we have the squids helping to make us all look dangerous and stupid. We need all the good, possitive energy we can get.

But I accept I may be wrong all together and maybe I should shut up, keep to myself, and just ride. I know the idea that everyone wants to be left alone feels sad.
* 2003 Kawasaki ZRX1200R *
"What good fortune for those of us in power that people do not think. " Hitler - think about that one for a minute.

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#7 Unread post by poppygene »

I think you've just happened upon a particularly un-friendly group, Becca. They're probably the kind who are too busy posturing to be concerned about or even notice anyone else.
There's a group ( I use that term loosely...) that meets at a spot not far from here every Thursday evening, weather permitting. It's not a club, per se, but they really are a very friendly bunch of folks, the common denominator being that everyone simply loves bikes and loves to ride. They bring an eclectic mix of bikes - everything from airhead Beemers to dual-sports and brand new Road Kings. And, yes, there are a couple lady-riders who come occasionally, too.

I guess my point is this: keep on looking for your group. When you find it, you'll be glad you didn't give up. Also, there's an old saying that goes something like this: To have a friend, you may find that you first have to be friendly. :wink:
Let me get this straight... it's one down and four up, right?

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iwannadie
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#8 Unread post by iwannadie »

scanevalexec wrote:
iwannadie wrote:
scanevalexec wrote:When I see riders out in the world at a stop, and we are both on bikes, I usually strike up a short conversation - usually about their bike. Most people love to talk about their bike.
i kind of get sick of random people wanting to talk bikes with me when they see i have one. i wish people would just ignore me most of the time ha.
So I take it that your advice is to not talk to anyone else? Do you think most people are annoyed when I ride up on a bike and ask about theirs? I'd still think it would be better to spread a sense of community.

And to address your issue with non-riders - I would still rather leave people with the impression that motorcyclist are a mostly friendly bunch. We have enough people affraid/misundestanding us are driving cages. Plus we have the squids helping to make us all look dangerous and stupid. We need all the good, possitive energy we can get.

But I accept I may be wrong all together and maybe I should shut up, keep to myself, and just ride. I know the idea that everyone wants to be left alone feels sad.
it all depends on the attitude, if someone wanders up and acts like my best friend suddenly because they start talking bikes then im annoyed. but if someone just throws out something about bikes to start conversation thats different. i jut dont like those 'experts' that just want to talk like they know everything suddenly because they see someone on a bike or whatever they take that que to try and show off their 'american chopper knowledge'
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#9 Unread post by old-n-slow »

iwannadie wrote:
i kind of get sick of random people wanting to talk bikes with me when they see i have one. sure i like talking bikes but most of the time is some guy going on how he loves 'xxxx brand/model' and how thats the only bike hed ever ride.
Were you looking in the mirror during this conversation? Sounds kinda like someone else we know. :clapping: :LOL2: :LOL2: :LOL2:
GarryS ---- "We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience."

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Rebeccaatthewell
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#10 Unread post by Rebeccaatthewell »

I am going to give the group another chance because basically they are the ONLY group in this area (read small town here) and I know that I am very hesitant when meeting new people so I will go back. It just surprised me that they were not more open and/or friendly. There were a lot of woment there, most were passingers but several were riders although all but one were with husbends boyfriends etc.. Maybe it's the single girl rider complex, I don't know, men are afraid to talk to a female rider in case their girlfriend/wife gets mad and I don't know why the women wouldn't talk, the reasons could be endless. I will try once more, and I will even try to wear clothes that "fit in" with this group more. We shall see.

Becca
The only time when evil can triamph, is when good men do nothing!

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