Total Motorcycle Community Forums

Alright here's the deal. I have been infatuated with motorcycles ever since i can remember. My Father lost his leg in a motorcycle accident when he was 23 years old ( he is now 58 tomorrow). In the hospital, they had 13 surgeons doing open heart surgery cause a rib went into his heart, and they had to amputate his leg all in the same time. He was at a stop sign in NYC and a guy drove right through him in an SUV going about 60. It was unpreventable. He obvously says that there will never be a motorcycle in my life while he is alive. When he was young, he use to race them back in italy, and his blood runs through my vains. He tells me he was one of the better drivers out there and i want to be like that too. "it is NOT that i don't trust you, it's that i trust no one else" those are his words......
Can i get any help on convincing or... should i just drop the subject?

-joe

Today... if you want to argue it at all tell him that it is life experience, good and bad, that made him the man you are proud to have as your father... and you need a chance to have similar experiences if you want to be as good a man as he is, as good a father to your own children.

When I started looking at bikes, my mother (who hasn't ridden) had no problems with it... she even started sending me lists of used bikes from local classified ads. My father (who had ridden) started telling cautionary tales of how a cager did this or he did that and how he's amazed he survived it... but neither would've attempted to argue me out of it or get me to change my mind. They know me too well.

Of course it helps that I have no reason to "convince" them and they know it.

You don't have to convince your father. (Unless you are a minor) He'll get over it.

i am not a minor, its a really difficult situation. He still lives in the 1960's Italy time where the father rules the house and what he says goes, but what boggles my mind is that i am NOT a minor, i am in college. I still need to convince him.

Do you still live with him while you go to school? My dad used to ride too...and when it was time for me to buy my bike, I told my dad that while I value and respect his opinion, I have made my decision. I think that even though he was involved in a really unfortunate accident, a small part of him knows the feeling that overcomes us when we take to the road.

Don't buy it today though....being Father's Day and all.

I do live under his roof. I go to school during fall and spring semisters. like always, and im here (home) for the summer. I think im just goona wait till i move out which is still in ... 3 years but can't do anything else. He really stepped his foot down. Should of saw him when i got my eyebrow pierced at college, i wanst allowed back to my house for at least 2 months... i think this motorcycle idea will just make him flip. I apprecaite all the help that you guys have done. Thanks.


-joe

So I take it he's never been in a car accident that was someone else's fault, right? Does he honestly think that if an SUV hit him from behind while doing 60 when he was stopped in a CAR that his injuries would have been lessened? In the immortal words of Snoop Dogg... "B1tch, please!"

Your father's paranoia is well-intentioned but misplaced. He has the "It happened to me, so it WILL happen to you" mentality, which is FAR too common.

I'd just get a damn bike. If he doesn't like it, tell him to lick Dave then move out.

i'm not saying you should disrespect your father's wishes, and there's a risk he could find out, which could affect your tuition and the roof over your head if he's helping you through school...

but...

you could, depending on the climate of the school you attend and it's proximity to your home/dad...

just get a bike at school, ride it in the fall and spring (and i would add as much of winter as possible), then rent a self storage locker and put it up for the summer. it would be tough to give up the ride during the time you are home, but as least you would get those precious months at school. depending on how many weeks are ridable it might be worth it to you. 3 years is a long time. heck, 3 months was a long time for me to wait after i had decided i wanted to ride (waiting for the brc).

really though this is blasphemous to consider on father's day, but something to think about. you are an adult and have the right to make the decision for yourself. but the fact that your father is generously continuing to help you out (it sounds that way at least) means his wishes deserve some consideration.

My buddy bought his first bike and parked it at his best friends house for six months before he decided to tell his parents....thats always an option...not the most favored option...but an option nonetheless.

Personly I think you should be honest, maybe take up track racing and use it off road, get your dad interested, it dosnt sound like your father was to blame for his accident, and it would give you experiance, and maybe you could share something together, the track has some dangers but you will be taking other people out of the equation.