Big fat hogs with belching pipes
Posted: Thu Aug 27, 2009 6:09 pm
Let's face it, as riders we all share a common gripe and that is inattentive cagers who seem to be out to kill us off in job lots. We all have complained and b itched about idiots driving while talking or texting on their mobiles, or sucking back from a big travel mug of coffee, or attempting to put on lipstick or shave. And to be perfectly honest, our complaints are legitimate, valid and with merit.
But have we ever considered about the other shoe on the other foot? The gripes and complaints cagers have about a couple types of riders? You know the ones, the squids tearing hell bent for leather down the highway on one wheel or my personal favorite dis-favorite, the cruiser poser who pulls the baffles out of his pipes and rips down the road farting and thundering like a constipated pig with a terminal case of flatulence.
Here is an Op-ed piece from the Vancouver Province that we all should read and consider carefully. As riders we have a special freedom but that freedom does come with some measure of responsibility and concern about our fellow road users, the cages.
But have we ever considered about the other shoe on the other foot? The gripes and complaints cagers have about a couple types of riders? You know the ones, the squids tearing hell bent for leather down the highway on one wheel or my personal favorite dis-favorite, the cruiser poser who pulls the baffles out of his pipes and rips down the road farting and thundering like a constipated pig with a terminal case of flatulence.
Here is an Op-ed piece from the Vancouver Province that we all should read and consider carefully. As riders we have a special freedom but that freedom does come with some measure of responsibility and concern about our fellow road users, the cages.
Column: Big fat hogs with belching pipes make me reconsider my stance against Tasers
By Wayne Moriarty, The ProvinceAugust 27, 2009
The noise police in Grandby Quebec have outlawed chainsaws on Sunday. In a related story, Leatherface doesn't plan on moving there anytime soon.
(Insert rimshot here.) The good people of Grandby aren't too happy with this new law. Apparently six days a week of felling trees and making firewood isn't enough.
Me? Well, I'm on the side of the legislators.
Clearly, if chainsaws are a problem in your community, then one day of peace from the noise hardly seems too much to ask.
I would like one day's peace from those damn motorcycles that scream up and down my street.
I'm not talking the sweet roar of a BMW K 1300. I'm talking a big fat hog with an exhaust system that has been retrofitted to make certain it can be heard from space.
The people who ride these bikes are pretty much the worst human beings on the planet. And that includes all members of the Bloc Quebecois and the entire cast to next season's Celebrity Apprentice.
As editor-in-chief of this august publication, I have fought strongly against the use of Tasers. However, where the riders of these bikes are concerned, I am willing to make some exceptions.
The people who own these bikes will argue that the really loud pipes are a safety precaution against careless drivers.
Problem is, most of the riders who have these pipes wear little more than soupcans on their heads for protection.
Ipso facto, safety doesn't seem to be all that high a priority.
John Fuller is an immensely talented news editor here at The Province. He lives in Vancouver's Kits. Not long ago one of these motorcycles roared up his street and sonically set off a car alarm.
This also happens every year at the Abbotsford Air Show when a CF-18 flies too close to the parking lot.
That's right, having one of these motorcycles ride down your street is akin to having a CF-18 in the neighbourhood.
Recently, I contacted Michael Wang, channel manager of Blackbox Phitek Systems Limited. Phitek makes these amazing headphones that all but eliminate surrounding sound.
I wrote him to ask how the headphones would hold up against 120 decibels of screaming motorcycle.
"So, 120 decibels of rumbling sound, or jet plane sound, will get reduced," he wrote.
Reduced. Not eliminated.
It seems then that only the deaf have absolute peace from these people.
Vancouver isn't alone with this problem. A quick Google search reveals numerous communities menaced by these machines.
Well, I am happy to report that I have the solution. Make them illegal. Make messing with your exhaust as illegal as messing with your odometer.
And if anyone complains about safety, tell them to buy a Volvo.
