10 True things

[Kal]

10 - Life is sexually transmitted.

9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and horns. If you see one without an erection, make him a sandwich.

7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

6 - Some people are like a Slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

5 - Health freaks are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you 50 quid and a substantial tax cut saves you 50p?

2 - In the 60s, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006:

We know exactly where any untaxed car is located among the millions of cars in Britain. But we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the DVLA in charge of immigration.

[Loonette]

8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and horns. If you see one without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Awesome!!

Cheers,
Loonette

[Nibblet99]

8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and horns. If you see one without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Awesome!!

Cheers,
Loonette

I want a sandwich

[bok]

6 - Some people are like a Slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

We here at the Slinky Anti-Defamation International Society for Tolerance wish for you to forthwith desist all hate crimes against slinkys and their cheap plastic knockoff cousins. oh it's a jolly good laugh when you nudge us and we fall over and over down your finely engineered stairs (alone or in pairs).

Have you ever once considered how the children of those damaged slinkys feel? not to mention those poor pitiful souls that get terminally tangled and mangled to the point where they can no longer make that slinkity sound.

fun for a girl and a boy my arse, fun for tormenters and enablers more like.

[Big B]

plus slinkys got their theme song ripped off by log

what rolls down stairs
alone or in pairs
and over your neighbors dog?

[fireguzzi]

It's log
It's log
It's big
its heavy
its wood!