New Rider, Pregnant Wife

[dr_bar]

If you plan to fail, you will succeed...

Insert die instead of fail and it still works. That's my opinion about an attitude like that.

30+ years of riding and two things haven't happened;

1) I still haven't dropped a bike.
2) I still haven't died.

Are the odds going to get the better of me??? I sure hope not.

Two things I plan for;

1) A long life.
2) A safe ride.

[tanitatt]

Bump up your life insurance and tell her you've got it covered.

Just kidding. I waited untill my daughter was 4 years old before I approached the idea of getting a motorcycle with my wife. I kept her involved in every step from choosing the bike and most importantly getting my gear. AND I promised her that I would never ride unless I was wearing all my gear.

I would honestly wait till after your child is born, and I'll tell you why. If I had picked up this hobby while still a single man, or a childless husband, I probably would be dead by now. But after my daughter was born, it's like a switch went off and I went to instant low gain on all of my recklessness. Everytime I get on my bike I remind myself that I need to be around for my daughter's graduation, wedding ... what not. Sounds cheesy, but I've suddenly got nothing to prove to anyone on the road, especially to those idiots who want to race me in their overly modified rice rockets. Having my daughter around really tempered that out of me and I think it would have the same affect on you as well.

Thomas

[dataplex]

All,

Thanks for the comments. I showed my wife this forum and she was appreciative that I was taking it up with a community of experienced people. I disagree that if you ride you will die on a bike.

I've know people who have been riding since before I was born and have never had a problem. I've also known some people who rode too hard or out of their league and they are no longer with us.

I also told her that having her and our child on the way has had a profound effect on the way I live life and the things that are important to me. A year or two ago and I would not have been ready for a bike - irresponsible and unconcerned with consequences. Today however, I have people who look up to me and who need me around and it does weigh in on the decisions I make.

I think we'll compromise. I'm going to discuss with her the safety course I took and the lessons learned there. I'm also going to get a dirt bike for our ranch and teach her about motorcycles so she's more comfortable around them. Then in a year or two I'll come back and approach the idea of a road bike that we both can enjoy.

She even mentioned the idea of us riding together in the future - something I never thought I would hear her say!

Anyway, I appreciate all the responses and look forward to getting to know some of you as I explore and post on the forum more (it's my homepage now)!

-dpx

[Lion_Lady]

I think you kinda blew it by signing up for the class without discussing what happens after you pass.

The best you can hope for is damage control right now, I think.

If you want to really win points for the future, I suggest you put motorcycling on hold for now. Don't spend any more money - especially on a motorcycle. It is amazing the number of barely ridden "like new" motorcycles that go up for sale - because the owner had to admit there was little TIME to ride, once an infant was introduced into the household.

The magnificent machine they were so proud of, was forced to take a back seat to family life.

You have the future. Fatherhood needs to take priority over 'personal fun' for now.

P

[anarchy]

All,

Thanks for the comments. I showed my wife this forum and she was appreciative that I was taking it up with a community of experienced people. I disagree that if you ride you will die on a bike.

I've know people who have been riding since before I was born and have never had a problem. I've also known some people who rode too hard or out of their league and they are no longer with us.

I also told her that having her and our child on the way has had a profound effect on the way I live life and the things that are important to me. A year or two ago and I would not have been ready for a bike - irresponsible and unconcerned with consequences. Today however, I have people who look up to me and who need me around and it does weigh in on the decisions I make.

I think we'll compromise. I'm going to discuss with her the safety course I took and the lessons learned there. I'm also going to get a dirt bike for our ranch and teach her about motorcycles so she's more comfortable around them. Then in a year or two I'll come back and approach the idea of a road bike that we both can enjoy.

She even mentioned the idea of us riding together in the future - something I never thought I would hear her say!

Anyway, I appreciate all the responses and look forward to getting to know some of you as I explore and post on the forum more (it's my homepage now)!

-dpx

excellent!!! sounds like the two of you are on on the same train of thought... just be careful - you'll be home watching the baby while she's out riding!!!

best wishes for you and the family...

[ANDS!]

I disagree that if you ride you will die on a bike.

Hes not saying if you ride youll die. If you do nothing BUT ride. . .of course youll die - statistically the more you ride the more youll increase your chances of being that number. . .but of course if you ARE super-careful, you die of something else or natural causes before you actually die on a bike (or a plane, a boat, a car, bungee jumping, base jumping, skydiving, etc). Its kinda zen if you think about it.

[Shorts]

Hello all...I just passed the motorcycle safety course this weekend and went and got my class M license at the DPS office this morning. I've been wanting to ride all my life and now is my chance. But there is one hangup...

My wife is 3 months pregnant and she is very upset that I would consider starting to ride when our first child is on the way. I'm willing to accept the risks that come with riding and I believe that having a family and big responsibilities like this will make me a more caution rider.

She is not about to hear anything of the sort. How do I help make her more comfortable with me riding? I told her I'd start out riding with groups of experienced riders and I would not venture into any large cities with a lot of traffic for a couple years until I could handle that kind of situation.

Any suggestions?

Well, I'm with above, you blew it by not duscussing it with her. You've got your boys in a grinder now, the only way out is through the other end.

And YOUR WIFE IS PREGNANT. You do know that they have raging hormones when they are pregnant, right? Not to mention, she's probably feeling super vulnerable now and you "ditching" her (that's what she may feel like) to go out riding by yourself may not make her too happy, regardless of your motivations.

You should start seeing from your wife's perspective and emotional state - I don't think you've got the luxury to "put her at ease", but rather, be in her shoes.

Good luck discussing it with her. Hopefully yall can find a compromise that is good for future riding.

[MAKER]

ya dude, i did the same thing- pregnant wife, learned to ride, bought a bike.


there was nothing i could do except tell her how careful i would be, and am being.

she was pissed. she's calmed down some now.

your answer is you need TIME, TO SHOW HER YOU ARE BEING RESPONSIBLE, and LESS PREGNANCY HORMONES-LOL- because she's completly valid in her opinion, but the why she's probably expressing it to you because of the hormones? NOT SO GOOD LOL

MAKER

[Dragonhawk]

I'm so glad I'm single.

[Johnj]

If you plan to fail, you will succeed...

Insert die instead of fail and it still works. That's my opinion about an attitude like that.
30+ years of riding and two things haven't happened;
1) I still haven't dropped a bike.
2) I still haven't died.
Are the odds going to get the better of me??? I sure hope not.
Two things I plan for;
1) A long life.
2) A safe ride.

And that my friends is what you call tempting fate. Way back in the olden days I was in the Marine Corp. When I was in NCO school, being taught how to plan a battle of a fire fight, it was always stressed that you must also plan for everything going wrong. Otherwise when the poo hits the fan, well lets just say it isn't pretty.